Well, isn't that cute. I suppose my last journal was 2 years ago give or take (didn't bother to look) and it seems like it would be more beneficial to me than the 1-2 people that will ever read it. So cute... How I expected things to be. That things would get better in the Air Force... That glorious pile of shit the recruiters feed you on your way in. Little did I know I'd walk out worse than I came in... With major depression, PTSD, OCP, 2 miscarriages and cardiovascular/respiratory problems. Glorious. So, with three ways out of the Air Force, I hastily made my way out to do what? Be a mom. Granted, this is a huge goal for me, but it's also a lot of change at once. Now, with the expectation of staying at home for years on end to care for a child that will hopefully make it out of the womb, I am left with the everlasting depth of disappointment and despair towards the future. God knows, many people get caught in this rut and never make it out. I just hope I can look past the present and keep working towards those giant goals I've set for myself in the future. On a more positive note... There will be new art (soonish). As soon as I can discover what my intended study will be, you will see a lot of changes on this page.

As always,

V/R

Jessica N. Muse